I wonder about something all the time.
What makes us so different?
Is there such a thing as the magic or lucky gene pool?
Is this something that alters the pattern of our lives and shapes our existence because of who brought us into the world? Maybe the so-called lucky gene pool only applies and helps the so-called fortunate who were born under a favorable sign.
Then maybe this is not so much a case of favorable genetics and more because of a sizable bank account or good looks or physical ability –
What brings people to the top or sinks them to the bottom?
Is it their drive? Is it tenacity? Is this contingent upon a person’s resilience or their ability to endure?
Maybe some people want “it” more and they are willing to fight or work or do whatever it takes to reach their goal.
Or is this all a game of chance?
Is this all about luck and that luck has everything to do with it?
Could be . . .
But good luck and bad luck can happen to anybody.
Every sky sees a storm cloud and every life has been touched by the sad deluge of heavy rains.
I will say though –
Fate might like to smile sometimes and frown at others.
I don’t know what the answer is.
What I do know is all we can do is keep on.
When it’s tight and the heart is heavy and when times are hard on the soul or when you find yourself alone and your back is against the wall – what do you do?
I ask this because the answer to this question is what makes all the difference.
How do you handle your adversity?
Do you surrender in silence? Or do you surrender in stillness?
Do you submit? Do you shake your head in a weak moment and crawl back to a place where we used to hide?
Do you accept the terms and work hard anyway?
I came to the understanding that the only person keeping score is me –
If it’s me then it’s my turn to tally my votes and count my tasks. It’s my turn to discover my victories and regard my successes because otherwise – all else is left up to the random factos of pass or fail. And let’s face it . . .
No one wants to fail.
I don’t know what a “hard worker” is.
I only know that there are workers and doers. There are smart workers and there are lazy workers and at times when it seems like life is too much work, there are quitters too, which also takes work.
Everything takes work. So update your viewpoint, folks, because life can kick up some dust at times and blind us from seeing clearly.
Everything takes work, even laziness.
Friends are work. Love takes work. It takes work to wake up in the morning, to clean yourself and get ready for the day.
It takes work to learn, which is fine because it is by struggle and resistance that one gains strength. Sometimes, it is only by might that we make it through, so-to-speak.
There are no consequences they say.
It has been said that perfection is not an accident.
Neither is true success.
So . . . .
because that’s what makes the difference
Get up . . .
Move.
Understand that movement is the enemy of depressive thinking.
Understand that action takes place and thoughts can change which means our feelings can change. Hence, our chemistry can change – making us clearer and capable.
I do not say that life is easy. I do not say this is a simple fix to “just” replace thoughts with action.
I laugh when people give others suggestions about anxiety because in the fit of a crisis or in the flood of anxious thoughts, or when you’re hurting or if your heart is broken – suggestions are like unwanted nails across a chalkboard.
Ever hear the saying:
In the history of calming down, no one has ever calmed down, simply by being told to calm down.
I say this a lot because this saying is true – and therefore, our rights to our thoughts and feelings are true because think about it – how often have you thought or truly “felt” something awful inside of you – and then someone comes over to say, “Don’t think like that!!”
Or don’t feel that way . . .
But what if we DO think this way or we DO feel that way?
Then what?
It is not wrong to say what you think or feel or what’s on your mind. However, people run from this topic and try to escape their thoughts or feelings.
But to what avail?
Does this help?
I say that as long as you’re talking about your crisis to someone helpful, then you are moving in a better direction than you think.
The trick is to find the right people to speak to.
I dare reach out to say this as a person who operated help-lines for a suicide prevention desk. Sometimes people need to let themselves say what they think – and the idea of freedom or the idea that this can all stop and go away – this is the real goal. It’s not death or dying so much – It’s the fact that the unbearable can stop and at least there’s a release or a relief from the burdens around us.
It’s a need to escape or to jump out of the race because otherwise, you’re out of breath and you can’t keep up anymore.
No one asks to feel badly. No one signs up for depression and certainly, nobody wants to hate themselves or dread their own reflection in the mirror. Telling someone “Don’t think like that” or “Don’t feel that way” doesn’t stop or change someone from thinking or feeling the way they do.
Movement – this helps.
The idea of freedom –
The idea of being free from the weight on your chest and the weight in your heart and the idea of the thoughts that punish you just . . . going away – that’s the dream. That’s the hope. That’s the wish.
But wishes seem so far away sometimes. (Am I right?)
Just to reiterate a common statement:
I would rather someone be honest with me about this and talk to me than smile and tell me how everything is okay, when it’s not.
I’d rather listen now than find out later that yet, there goes another voice I will never hear again.
But just so you know-
There are people to speak with and those who want to help and these are people who we should choose wisely when we look for advice. There are those who are unhelpful which is not because they mean to be or because they don’t want to help.
Either way –
Move . . .
Do something.
Replace thoughts with action.
Do not sit still.
Do not submit because the rage in you and the sadness of the depressive gland in our mind is thumping and screaming and next, we face an explosion which can take place – unless we find a way to ease the tension.
This is why I encourage people to talk. Say what you need to say.
But wait – this is about my bucket list. Right?
This list of mine and these items that I’m looking to achieve are actions to prove my life is worth more than an outside opinion.
This is to rise above the rage or the features of an unsatisfied existence.
This is to be better . .
This has nothing to do with success or the lucky gene pool.
I remember hearing people say how tragedies make people stronger.
I was once told how God only gives us what we can handle.
I know of people who have endured the unthinkable and they were told about how strong they were and, in fairness, I’m sure if you asked them, they’d be fine to be less strong and not have to go through what they went through.
But such is life. Am I right?
Find what you love.
Look around you.
Create an action.
Go, Be and Do.
There’s a great big world out there.
Beware of the tricks and the deception of your perception.
I can say the mind plays tricks and so does life.
I can also say that recovery can happen at any given moment.
So can miracles and so can we – recover, I mean.
I can say that while I don’t know how some people succeed and other people sink, I can say that some people rise up from depths that I have never imagined.
I can say life ain’t easy.
And regardless to whether life is worth it or not – all I know is YOU are worth everything.
You are someone I look up to.
You are my source of redemption and my access to peace.
It’s you.
Good morning Mr. Mirror . . .
It’s good to see you too.
The Written Addiction 