There is no time for New Year’s resolutions. Not today. Or should I say at least, “Not for me.”
I am reminded of a line from a song that says, “The revolution will not be televised.”
This is not to say that I am looking for a revolution or the need to revolt nor am I entering my plea for political attention; however, I am showing the need for change.
I was the youngest in my house. I was the little brother too and the one, always trying to tag along, and always poking the bear, so to speak, and always crying after I took the beating, which I probably instigated.
It is true, I was the little one and yes, it is also true that being the little one led to certain unfortunate things.
This led me to things like dead-arms or dead-legs, which is literally when someone punches you in the arm or leg.
A lot happens in 30 years.
I was awake last night, asking myself about the things I have done and the places I’ve been to since this day back in 1989. I was only a kid then.
I thought about the people and the places I’ve seen and how I swore that I would never see them again, but yet, fate does what fate does.
Suffice to say that life has its own rhythm. Suffice to say that so do I and so do you. Life is funny down here on Project Earth.
I used to react to everything. Or, more accurately, it would be better to say I used to overreact to everything. But such is life with anxiety disorders. This is the struggle I had between rational and irrational thinking.
I used to have panic attacks.
Ever have one?
There is an idea I have been rewriting for a long time now. The shape is different and so is the flow. I suppose the prose changes whenever I change but yet, the core is the same. The body is the same too, just older, like I am now, older, but still me and deep down, coming clearer, the more I revisit this idea, the more I capture my growth:
There was a helpful exercise I remember from a class that I took on transformational coaching in which, the entire class held up a sheet of paper. Everything else was to be cleared from our desk,
The instructor told us all to close our eyes and hold up the sheet of paper.
With our eyes closed, we were instructed to fold the paper in half and then rip off the top, right hand corner of the page.
Hello, my name is Ben and I a member of Christmas Anonymous, which means that at one point, I had a problem with the Christmas season. This is not to say that Christmas Anonymous is a real thing but for the moment it is.
The following is my qualification for membership, which, I have learned to overcome. And so, with hopes to reach those who’ve been through their struggling similarity; I offer this message of hope because although heartfelt, the truth is we can all overcome anything, should we so choose to.
The truth is we never know the impact we have upon each other. A smile, or a simple thing, like the word, “Hello,” can be much bigger than we think. In fact, the simplest gestures can in fact create the biggest miracles.
I believe the reason why I wanted to write is the same reason why anyone does anything. I began to write because I wanted to find my way.
I wanted to understand myself but more than anything else, I wanted to find my own source of freedom.
In this case, everything I would have to write about would need to be true, which may not be true to you or anyone else —but that was okay with me because everything I wrote and everything I journaled is and was true to me. And such is the same that can be said about perception, in which I mean perception is not truth; it’s just true to me, which is fine for now.
Make no mistake, There needs to be a plan before we go forward. This plan needs to be clear and thought out. There needs to be a goal and a strategy to achieve it. We have to establish this; otherwise, we find ourselves on the doorstep of an undesirable outcome.
Before heading into a meeting, or making a phone call, and before starting a job or a project, regardless to the work we have to do, there needs to be an idea. There needs to be a vision to focus upon or else we run the risk of missing our target. Keep in mind, everything we do we do for a reason. Everything we do is to honor a want, a thought, a feeling or a need. This will run the gamut between simple and complicated, but regardless to the details; the same rules apply. So make it a plan.