The hardest part of my fall from grace was not the next day or the day after. The hardest part is when I could not run away anymore. I could not deny what I had done
I held on to the secret of my relapse like a dirty lie that continued to whisper in my ear. Six months away the farm, and I gave in. The actual time of my relapse happened long before I found myself on Rockaway Parkway in a minivan filled with stolen equipment. There were steps leading up to my failure. There were obvious warning signs, but noticing them meant I would have to do something about. Noticing the signs I saw meant I would have to face some painful truths.
When asked about this time in my life, I always explain that I Continue reading
Something I know and I will always know is that Daddy’s little girl, no matter how she grows or where she goes; she will always be Daddy’s little girl. I cannot say what it means to have a son. I never had a little boy. I only have a little girl. I cannot say what the bond is like to have otherwise; I can only tell you what it feels like when a tiny girl’s life looks at you for the first time and says the words, “Da-Da,” which eventually transforms into the word, “Daddy,” or Dad.”
There have been books written about parenting. There have been men, very much like myself, who have recorded their Continue reading
And you want to run . . .
. . .you really do
but you can’t . . .
You can’t because there’s nowhere to go
too many people depend on you
you want to hide but there’s no place to go
You think to yourself,
“It would be nice if Continue reading
I want to go someplace . . .
I want to be somewhere far away from the city where people smile and say hello. I want be where the wind sounds like music, and where rainfall is beautiful like a fairytale or a lullaby.
I want go someplace where the Continue reading