1)
Silly kids . . .
It is really no point in
reviving the arguments
or fighting the fights
just to keep them alive
when essentially
they mean nothing.
Literally . . .
. . . nothing.
I am no more sure of myself
than you are sure of you.
However,
when I was young,
I was told to mind my business
or watch my mouth
and hold my tongue.
But in the interim, I see that
no one follows their own advice
and so
it becomes another subject
of do as I say
and not as I do.
I swear . . .
The humor in our hypocrisy
is enough to make me laugh
because otherwise
crying over spilt milk
makes no sense
and neither is reliving
the violations or the intrusions
from our past
which come up when two people
cannot get along.
I swear, your enemy
could bring back the dead,
cure cancer,
solve the deficit
and save lives and still
they’d be your enemy
no matter what.
I am not above any of this
by the way.
I am the same
like you
and to be clear
getting the last word in
does not solve the fact
that two “so-called adults”
could not get along
or resolve their problems
between each other
and so—
we take to name calling
or thumbing our nose at each other
and say silly little things like
I don’t like you|
or
I’m not play9g with you
anymore.
Really?
Is this who we have become?
2)
I admit to my worries that somehow
I have slid backwards
or back down the social ladder
to return to the status
of a social parasite.
It is not true
actually
and nor is it true that you or I
are fair
and nor is it true
that opinion is fact
and the fact remains
that most times
the truth lies between my side
and your side —in which case
there’s my side, your side
and the, there’s the truth
in-between.
I admit that facts do not care
about our emotions.
I admit that being right
takes way too much energy
and so, in fairness
I admit that I was wrong
in so many ways, —and yes,
there is a word for this.
There is more than one word.
However, one of the words is unfair
the other is immature
and then I can see how
the word “insecurity” fits in well too
but more,
this is what becomes of people
when feelings are hurt
and pride says
Goddammit!
No one has the right
to do this to me!
So, go ahead
keep the fire burning
and let your hate
destroy you
3)
I was old to mind my business.
I was told to watch myself too
and not just my mouth.
I was also told
do not trusty anybody
and of course,
there were times
when I gave my trust
and I was done wrong.
When I was young,
I was told to play nice
to share
play fair
and of course,
I was told to “hold hands”
when crossing the street.
It seems to me
that we have all gone far away
from where we came from.
I was told to “say you’re sorry,”
when you hurt someone’s feelings
and I was told not to take
what doesn’t belong to me,
not to steal, and more;
I was told if you don’t have anything
nice to say
then don’t say anything
at all.
Once more,
I think we have all strayed
from the path
but again
the humor in our hypocrisy
is enough to make me laugh
or otherwise cry
4)
I have no way
of defending the times
when I have trespassed
against someone
and nor can I defend the way
someone else
has trespassed against me.
I do believe in this thing called
contributory negligence
and yes,
I can see how I have been negligent
on both the offensive
and the defensive side
of my arguments.
Yes—
I am far from perfect
and the funny thing
is no one argues that they are perfect.
But again
the humor in our hypocrisy
should be enough for us to realize
that none of this is funny
and yes, both of us
have contributed
to where we are now,
on either side
of the argument.
We can stop fighting now.
Or . . .
Some people refuse to let you
forget what was said
or to forget about your past
because to them,
they were part of this
and the fact is
they will never forget your past
either.
Some people refuse to forgive
Some refuse to move on
Some people keep their hatred alive
and some blaze like a fire
to keep their anger burning
so that their eyesight never gets dim,
in case their time for revenge
comes around.
The truth of the matter is . . .
The best revenge is the realization
that I don’t need revenge at all
Beside –
Misery kills
And I don’t have to offer a helping hand
because if I do
I have to understand
that misery is equally contagious
and to be honest
I’ve caught enough cases of misery
in my life
or better
I’ve had enough misery
for more than one lifetime.
5)
If it is all the same
then it is all the same
and in the end
there is no need to keep
the fights alive
or let the arguments burn
at both sides of the candle.
I used to figure
that the bridges I burn
could light my way
but, ah
those fires died out long ago
and loneliness is one thing
but being alone
and left in the dark
when it’s cold outside
is enough to make me realize something
I was wrong . . .
I don’t mind being wrong.
I don’t mind being alone as much
either.
The light of truth
can be hurtful,
I’m sure . . .
but it’s better to see,
albeit painful
than it is to live blindly
and face my end
by myself and dealing
with more of the same
Alone~
The Written Addiction 