I took a long drive to see an old friend at a time when he needed a friend most.  He was a good friend and a good boy once. But that was a long time ago. The good boy I knew was buried beneath a history of child abuse from an alcoholic father. The boy I knew was buried beneath the scars of his lifestyle and buried beneath years of drug addiction, jail time, and beneath the life that comes with being a low-level street junkie.  But years ago, I swear, his eyes were one of the brightest. His laugh was contagious and his character was enough to always catch attention.

There are Continue reading →

To The Civilian:

There are different battles for different kinds of people. Some battles are more deliberate; some of them are more strategic and cold, some battles are quietly long, and linger on painfully, and some battles come with flashes of violence against enemies both seen and unseen, heard and unheard. It would be inaccurate to say wars are limited to one specific battlefield.  And complete with different battlegrounds, life happens, and each person has their own war front.
In some cases, the hardest battle for one person is considered peaceful to another. In most cases, however, the Continue reading →

It was wintertime in the year 1989. I found myself underneath a bridge that stretched over the Meadowbrook Parkway. My skin was a greener shade of pale and I was painfully thin.
I had no idea of what time it was or how long I had been sitting beneath the bridge. The gray sky was losing sunlight, and soon enough the blustery cold day would become a blustery cold night.
I was sitting on south side of the Parkway, situated up at the top of a concrete hill beneath the green, structural beams that made up the underside of the bridge. I was far enough away from the speeding cards that drove along and far enough away from prying eyes. More importantly, I was Continue reading →

The idea of tomorrow seems too far away for a young mind to consider. I remember because after all, I was young once too. I swore the fire from the bridges I burned would light my way. Eventually, the firelight from the burning brides dwindled as I moved on. When I turned back to see where I was, the light was gone, and it was too late to turn back. It was too dark for me to retrace my footsteps and I was unsure how I had gotten to this point. I was in deep and spiraling downward in an out of control sickness.

Closing of winter, the sun returned Continue reading →

Everything is a blur. The reasons I became this way and what I went through to get here had all been dulled like an old knife that was left in a drawer someplace, rusted, and aged without the resemblance of its once shiny self. There I was at the sick house with fellow drunks and fellow junkies, drying out for their first few days, and wondering, dumbfounded, with the same look in the eye and similar expressions on their faces. Each one in the house was Continue reading →

Before moving onward, I must first admit that I was far from a believer of any sort. In all sincerity, I found myself where I was as a result of my choices. In basic street terms, I copped a plea and took the easier choice. Instead of time behind bars, I chose a long-term treatment plan at an inpatient drug and alcohol facility. I was young, scrawny, sick, and petrified of my own shadow. My nerves were somewhat twitchy. I was foggy in mind, body and soul.

Upon entering my first interview with a Continue reading →