Now that I’ve taken a moment to talk about communication, I think it is important to recognize a few lessons and exercises that I have seen throughout the years. The first lesson came to me at a very rough time. This was years ago in the month of December 1989 to be exact. I was a young man on the verge of losing my Father. At the time, my Father (The Old Man) was in a coronary care unit after a series of heart attacks. By the way, this was the strongest man that I ever knew. Of course, my Dad could beat up your Dad. He was smarter too. He could fix anything (So there!) but above all, The Old Man was my very first hero.

The Old Man lay in his bed, almost gray, and weak as ever. I never saw him this way before. I never saw him as anything other than strong and capable. However, life is life, which means life is both eventual and inevitable. Age takes place and although my memories of The Old Man are of him and his strength, at his end, The Old Man was weak and humbled.

Question: How many times have you been at work and learned that you had to communicate with someone you don’t like? How many times has a name come to mind and you sort of roll your eyes? You think to yourself, “Oh, great! I have to deal with this one now!” How many times have you lost your patience when trying to explain yourself at work to someone who claims to know your job; yet, they truly have no idea what they are doing. Sound familiar?

They say good things come to those who wait. They also say patience is a virtue, which is another one of those sayings that used to drive me crazy. The dictionary says a virtue is a moral excellence or goodness; as if to say that if we wait patiently, then we are good. So, what do we do? We wait . . .

They call it work. Isn’t that right?
In a previous entry, I explained how a person told me, “If work was fun then they would call it something else.”
I discussed the personal mindset and the way our thinking affects our behavior.
This entry will not be much different. However, I will relate this more as a personal exercise in which I will expose the quitter’s mindset and offer my personal history. My aim is to detail how my thoughts impacted my behavior. As I mentioned in previous entries and as I plan to repeat; I am a real person. I have thoughts and feelings. I have a history. I have biases that range from memory bias to personal, to decision biases, thinking errors and fears, concerns and worries. Again, I am a real person.

I am thinking about taking a break from the norm. What I mean is I have an idea to break away from my regular routine with hopes to save my sanity and restore my soul. So, what exactly does this mean? This means that I need a vacation. Perhaps someplace warm. Yes, I think that would be nice. I could go to a place where the water is the color turquoise, the beach is filled with white sand and half bent palm trees swaying in the wind and the breeze blows by me like a dream. I am thinking of island drinks with tiny umbrellas that perch at the rim of a coconut cup with a triangle of pineapple that has been skewered and can be dunked in the white frothiness of the drink. I am thinking about the kind of time where I wouldn’t have to even wear shoes.

They always say “What goes around comes around.” They say don’t work angry. Don’t worry about revenge. I’ve heard people say “Keep the focus on yourself,” and “Don’t take things so personally.” By now, I’m sure that everyone has heard the saying, “It’s just business. It’s not personal.” And I’m sure that people are familiar with this saying too: “I’ve wanted to run away more as an adult than I ever did as a kid.”

My Mother used to tell me, “No one ever promised you a rose garden!” This means life is not going to play fairly. Others will not play fair in the sand box. Life happens. But either way, we have to find a way to get through.
I used to have a boss who would phrase this a little differently. He’d shout, “Suck it up!” and then walk away.
I have a shirt that says, “Nobody cares, Work Harder.”
Either way, the goal is to find the secret of our endurance which is different for everyone.

There are three major changes in life. There’s the home life, the work life and the relationship life. Changes in any of these are big and in the past year, all three things have been affected by the pandemic. Home life has changed. There is uncertainty with mortgage companies due to loss of income. Some people have moved to new places which is a big adjustment. But more than this are the changes that have come with our work life.

Safe to say there are more ways than one. I know this is something that people say, but there are times when people insist their way is the only way. This is not to accuse anyone of being right or wrong. This is only to say that as we grow confident with our craft or move forward in our field of business, we become comfortable with our own tactics and methods. Also, the more we grow comfortable, the less offended we are by those who suggest a different way.
I can say one thing without any doubt, the most comfortable person on the job is the person who is least intimidated by suggestions or change. This is a great person to learn from. It’s not the boastful one or the bragger; it’s the quiet one who is humble to feedback and appreciative of suggestions. This is who we learn from.

There was an afternoon I spent putting office furniture together. In fairness, I am not a fan of putting office furniture together. To be honest, I hate it. I am not a fan of the instructions that come with the furniture, nor am I a fan of the person who ordered this furniture. However, life does not always come with attractive options. Sometimes, the only option is to suck it up and do it. So I did.

Above all things, be humble. A good friend of mine told me this. He mentioned this advice after I reported a downfall of someone who was part of a role that was uncomfortable in my life.

Be fully mindful that all things can, do and will change. For as the saying goes, “What goes around, comes around.”
They say that revenge is a dish best served cold. They also say, which is biblical, and for the moment, I ask that you please excuse the reference but in any case; they say, “He among you who is without sin; let him be the one to cast the first stone.”
This is no different from the saying that people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. For the record, I don’t know anyone who is able to cast the first stone. But if I was to ever place a wager, I’d bet there’s a long line for the person who casts the second.
For the record, I’ve seen people in glass houses throwing stones. I’ve watched the pot call the kettle black. I’ve seen the gossip mills and the rumor factories go to work.