I agree when people tell me that days should never lose their meaning. However, there are days that come with titles or certain affiliations that come with different meanings and connections. There are birthdays and anniversaries. There are holidays or days that took place and changed our life and altered our direction for the rest of our days on Earth.
I cannot, will not and I do not say that life is fair and nor is there anything fair about the way life happens.
And life happens to everyone. Of course, this happens to everyone.
No one escapes or gets away unscathed or unmarked, untouched, or unbruised. And yet, this is life.
This is everything life is supposed to be, complete with sunny skies and rainy days.
Life is complete with ups and downs, trials, tribulations, rises and falls and failures and successes.
Joy. Pain.
Live, love, laugh, and learn.
These five things which I mentioned above are basic facts of life.
I am sure that it can be easy to lose to the excess of bad news. And I can say that in my years, there have been days, weeks, and months that were hard to say the least.
I have scars. I’ve broken bones. I’ve lost blood, sweat, and tears and I have lost all the above on more than one occasion.
This is true.
But again, I agree that days should never lose their meaning, despite their attachments in our hearts or the definitions behind them.
I understand the connection to things, like, say, the dates where something good happened.
I can appreciate the dates that have meaning, even when their meanings went away, or worse; I can appreciate the fact that death comes for us all.
I can understand the feelings of sad and regretful memories or the mourning we feel when our loved ones pass away.
Or say this –
I understand the way we feel about the day at hand and the meaning behind this Sunday, which is Mother’s Day, May 10, 2026.
Mother’s Day is no longer the same to me. Today does not mean what it used to mean because I have not seen you or heard your voice since early June in the year, 2015.
I still find the years and the dates to be strange. I say this because the idea of living in a new millennium was odd to me.
We thought there’d be flying cars and people living in outer-space by this time.
And while there are changes in technology, and we can have video conferences and face-time and cell phones can do phenomenal things; we can send pictures, videos, and social media remembers mine, yours and everyone else’s birthday . . .
Therefore, it is easy to remember to say hello or send a virtual card.
It is Mother’s Day, 2026.
Where has the time gone?
I remember when the clock struck midnight to end the year 1999.
I remember there were fears that everything was about to shut down and that the computers would not know what to do. But we turned out okay.
Nothing happened.
No tragedies took place. At least, nothing so tragic that it made the news.
That was 26 years ago.
I have kids working for me who were not alive for 26 years . . .
What the hell is that?
And as for the news, who knows what the news is or what’s true, false, fabricated, or who knows if the dog wags its tail or the tail wags the dog?
I don’t know what you would think if you could see the world as it is, Mom.
I don’t even know if you would be proud of me or angry or wondering when I’d get out of my own way, so that I could be happy.
I do believe that the eyes in heaven see things from a much different perspective. The eyes in Heaven never blink because they do not need to.
I believe that yes, that which is of flesh is of flesh and that which is of spirit is of spirit.
You are of the spirit.
Your eyes see clearly now.
There are no interruptions anymore.
You were removed from the body and somewhere, or should I say elsewhere, you exist in that huge great plateau, also known as paradise.
Or at least, so I hope.
I have subscribed to the idea that no; nothing can ever be so strong as a Mother’s love. Therefore, a Mother’s love can never die.
Or at least, so I hope.
I am not so strong nor am I so great and nor is the time or the place or the way I live as good as I hoped it would be.
But again, no day should ever lose its meaning, regardless of how they’ve changed or how our connection with them has been altered.
I don’t remember my first Mother’s Day gift to you. And to be fair, I can’t say I remember the last Mother’s Day card or the last Mother’s Day gift.
All I can say is this. . .
You
You never gave up on me.
Please don’t give up on me now.
I do not think words or flowers or a gift of any kind can make up for the gifts you have given me.
Namely life. Namely the name, which I own.
At the same time, today has lost its meaning, despite the fact that no day should ever lose its meaning.
No matter how I try, your old phone number doesn’t ring anymore.
The mailman told me your address is beyond his reach and the Universe never says whether you get my letters or whether you send a response or not.
I miss you, Mom.
I wish there was more I could have done.
But I am just a man and that which is of flesh is of flesh.
And I am just one of those of the flesh, a sinner, afraid, and searching for my best possible self.
One day, I hope . . .
We will all see each other again.
Someday
Maybe
Hopefully.
But until then, Happy Mother’s Day, Mom
Wherever you are.
Nothing has ever been the same without you
Love always
your son
B ~
The Written Addiction 