Author Archives: bennyk1972

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A Way to Stop, Drop, and Let Go

I remember the saying I used to hear back in grade school. This is the saying that taught us, “You are what you eat,” and therefore, we are what we consume.
I agree. We are what we eat. We are what we consume.
We are what we think and feel.
I agree with this too because how could we be anything else?

We are the sum of our assumptions. Therefore, even if our assumptions do us a disservice, same as unhealthy foods can be unkind for the body, then unhealthy thinking is unkind to the soul.

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A Way to Stop, Drop, and Let Go

What are we? Or perhaps I should ask why are we the way we are?
Are we the body we live in? Are we the products of our environment?
Are we two kids who aged but never grew up?
I wonder.
Are we more than just living breathing things that walk and talk or think and feel?
I hope we are.
Is this a dream? If this is a dream, is there a way that we can change the plot?
Can we make a change to see something different or something new?
I think that would be nice.

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A Way to Stop, Drop, and Let Go

It is morning, again and I am grateful.
I am wondering about the birth and creation of new things or the possible rebirth of everyday life. I am thinking about our wealth that has nothing to do with our home address or the size of our bank account.
I am thinking about our inherent wealth. This is the wealth that we were born with and the wealth that we live with as well as the wealth that we overlook or take for granted.

We all have this.

I am here in the midst of so many things. I am alive and well, at least for the most part. I have all my fingers and toes. My eyes are not perfect, but I can see and therefore, I still have the benefit of sight.
I cannot hear as well as I used to but regardless, I can hear well enough to enjoy the sound of my dreams or my most special loved one.
I can touch and I can feel. I can taste. I can think.
However, I have grown to the point and understand that thinking is often the root of our own great suffering. Now is a good time to change this.

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A Way to Stop, Drop, and Let Go

Let it go.
I have been told this for years.
Let it go.
Stop thinking about the things that drag you down or pull you back and keep you from being free.

What does it mean to be free?
What does it mean to be disconnected from the thoughts which betray you?

Or here’s a good question, how often do you imagine the scenarios that hurt your own feelings?

What does it mean to separate or divorce yourself from the ideas that spin you around? Better yet, what causes you to spiral down and lose another day in your life?

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A Day Called Way Back When

Keep me, please.

Keep me with you, old memories, hanging like a light bulb in the attic of my heart. Keep me whole and present in the warmth of your bosom. Let me hold your memory like old lovers do, or like those who refuse to let go of one another.
Let me think this way and let me believe that the word never can never exist.

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A Day Called Way Back When

I go back to that old idea that helps me decipher between me and myself or the madness of my ideas. Better yet, I go back to the method that helps me salvage myself and keeps me breathing.
So?
Let me leave this here.
Let me leave my words without thinking about them and let me let my thoughts take off from this point.

Let me confess my thoughts which are not so crazy, to say the least, but dreamy if anything. I am hopeful, or like the aspirations of youth, I view my dreams as my spirit that stems from the purity of heart.
I am opening this entry with hopes to make myself clear, or if not clear, at least not misunderstood or muddied like a lake disturbed by the unwanted footprint of dirty souls.

Therefore, I confess.

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A Day Called Way Back When

I was listening to a man give an update about his health. This happened yesterday morning while sitting on the train and heading to work.
The video came after the man’s double lung transplant.

He has no memory of the last few months of his life.
Absolutely none.
However, his wife documented the last few months in her journal. I am sure this was hard for him to read. I am equally sure it was surprising for him to learn about the people who came to support him.

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A Day Called Way Back When

What do I miss most?
Do you mean the good days?
Or when you ask what do I miss the most, do you mean who, or what, why, when and where?

I suppose there are differ answers to all the above.
Of course, I miss the good times. I miss being resilient.
I miss being able to get back up and snap back into place. I miss the ability to heal as if I was never hurt to begin with, or as if I never fell at all.

Sure, I miss that.

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A Day Called Way Back When

I might have to file this under T.M.I. as in Too Much Information.
But hey, there’s no one here but us, at least for now.

Did you ever have one of “those” dreams?
They are sexual, yet nothing sexual happens. They are intimate and somehow there is an intimate understanding as if to prove that something sexual is about to happen.
And soon too.

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A Day Called Way Back When

I don’t know what life would be like without music. Then again, I don’t know what my memories would be like without the songs or the anthems of my youth.

I just don’t know.

I used to love my early morning drives. I still do.
I love driving off when the sun comes up and the music from the radio in my car is not too loud, but loud enough to let my mind slip into different rhythms.

The sun is coming up behind me and I am off and gone, just driving in my own mindless way, carefree and disconnected, if that makes any sense.

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