When I was young, I used to talk over people because I was afraid that my point would never be heard. I have grown since then and yet, there are times when I find that I am doing this because childishly, I have this concern that my point will not be heard. As a matter of fact, there are people who live their entire life this way. There are people who work this way too, which is more common than we think. There are those who have a need to be heard and listened to. There are those who struggle with an insecurity; as if to assume that someone is always looking to come along and take what they have. There are people who find themselves in constant debates, and why? Plus, what purpose does this serve? Does this help them win friends or does this only help them to influence people? Besides, what does this say about them? Or better yet, if this is me and I do this; then what does this say about me? Or better yet, why do we argue anyway?
Continue readingCategory Archives: Notes From The Coach
Allies over Enemies
I am writing to you from an undisclosed location in a hotel room that is located in a state, which is south of my own city. This is day three of a five day class in which some of the information is new to me. Most of the material is something I have either learned through outside training or in other courses but either way, the course has been helpful. I like the idea of learning new things. I like to see how different assistance programs package their information. It is clear to me that I have earned my place at the table. It is clear to me that I have my own incentives. I have my own intentions and my own personal motivation. I have my own agenda, which is not to say that I am selfish or all too self-serving. Instead, this is more about a dream I have and a new direction I want to take. This is about my choice to improve my career. Nothing else.
Continue readingThe Think Challenge
There is a saying, I think, therefore I am.
Think about this for a second. I think, therefore I am. So, if I think I am lost, then I must be lost. If I think I am a victim then I must be the victim and, if I think that I am destined to fail, then lo and behold, I suppose I will fail.
This makes sense.
(Right?)
For Awareness Week
In honor of awareness week, I thought I would spend a little time to write my thoughts about prevention and personal maintenance. To be clear, I don’t know if awareness week is only an American thing. Maybe it is. But I do know that worldwide, someone dies from suicide every 40 seconds. And by the way, I get it. Nobody wants to read about this. Nobody wants to think about this, let alone talk about this or be open about the subject. So, I’ll understand why this thought goes unread. However, as someone who lived with depression throughout my entire life, it is important to me that I go forward.
Continue readingThe Science of Not Quitting
“Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible, and suddenly, you are doing the impossible.” St. Francis of Assisi ~
Part of the challenge I see is how we start out from the gate. We set our goals. We set our standards; then we make our plans, and there we are, at the starting line—and then “BANG!” the starter’s pistol fires and we’re off and running as fast as we can.
Continue readingPersonal Best
All of us are moving through life and as we do, we find ourselves lost on different fixations of judgment. Yet, we all have our own purpose and we all have our own fates and destiny. We have our own drives and passions. We are all unique, and yet, we are all similarly impacted by the climate around us.
Continue readingThis is My “Why”
So, what is it?
What is it that makes you get out of bed in the morning? What gives you the drive to keep going and what helps you get up even when you think that you can’t stand?
What is it?
See, I’ve been thinking about this. I’ve been thinking about this thing we call drive and the way it somehow pushes me, even when I want to quit. I might scream and I might complain or bellyache but in the end, I get up and I go. I do this everyday.
Outgrown
There was a theory I was told about animals whose quarters are too small for them. I was told that an animal cannot outgrow their surroundings. For example, a fish will not outgrow the size of its tank. But then I was told this is not true. I was told the size of our confinement does not change our DNA and that growth is inevitable.
I write this to you, not because I had a little fish that grew too big for my fish tank, which I did, by the way—the fish started off much smaller than the others. And the fish was bullied for a while. Until the fish grew larger. This is when the other fish took notice. The other fish tried to bully the smaller fish but its growth could not be stopped. Eventually, the other fish that were once aggressive had no choice but to submit. Even the smaller fish who never bullied at all—even they had to pay for this.
People Pleasing 101 – The Freedom of Honesty
I admit to my life openly and I do this to rid myself from the weight of my past. I do this because once I own myself, the weight of my judgment can dissolve and the ideas of shame, blame, guilt or regret can be wiped from my daily programs.
Rather than allow my past or my past results to be flagged or drawn in front of me as a mark of humiliation; I have chosen to embrace my old results. I embrace them as a process of learning—and therefore, no one can hold this against me. No one can ever charge me for mistakes that I am not brave enough to mention on my own.
It is interesting to me that by pointing out my truths, there are those who seem to see this as a call outward. But no, my call is not for help or support but instead, my call is my allowance for me to speak out for myself.
Continue readingUpdating Our Standards
I remember a saying that dates back from my childhood about Carnegie Hall. The saying is more like a question.
“How do you get to Carnegie hall?”
The answer is, “Practice.”
Practice makes perfect, right?
I have been part of a system in my life where I have been practicing almost everything. I practice new ways to eat or sleep. I have practiced new ways to exercise and new ways to change or improve. I have practiced my sales pitch and new methods at work. I have been at the hardest places in life, which is at the wall that we need to push through in order to get to the other side.
The Written Addiction 