today’s piece

I call this the ongoing goodbye for someone that never leaves.

Here I go,
I’m packed and moving out
I have the wind at my back
and the sun is on my face
I’m laughing at the pavement beneath my feet
and I’m gone

I am reborn
I am new
but most of all, I’m through with this

Here I go; I’m out the door
yesterday doesn’t matter
because I don’t live there anymore

This morning I woke up
I climbed out from under my sheets and that was it
I made the decision not to be sick anymore
and it’s as simple as that

There I go,
down the street.
different faces, different avenues.
New blocks, new buildings
another town, another time
and I’m gone

No more lying in bed, loveless,
looking at the ceiling
listening to seconds tick away before the alarm goes off

No more looking out the window
watching puddles catch raindrops ….and wondering
no more thinking you’re better than me
just because you say so

No more of anything
I’m out

I’m done…

Here I go
wishing for the spring in winter months
and there I go
thinking of autumn when the summer feels too hot

Here I go
wishing I stepped out each time I practiced this
and there you go
laughing because you knew I never would

How many times are you going to hold me back?
Or more important,
how many times am I going to let you?

But that’s it, this time
I mean it

Here I go
I’m out the door

I’m gone

Now,
Tell me again how I’ll never make it without you
Tell me how I’ll be back
how it’s cold out there…
and not to worry
you’ll still be here to keep my seat warm
laughing,
and waiting to say,
“I told you so.”

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