Here it is again. Monday morning has come and the alarm goes off again. My body is in a routine or a usual mode, so-to-speak. I can be mostly asleep and my body knows what to do, where to go, where the coffee is, how to push the magic blue button on the coffee machine and I can do nearly all of these things without much input from my surface mind.
I know where everything is. I know where I put my phone. I know where my sneakers are and where I placed my car keys so that come morning, I can start my car, to warm it up, and make my drive to work a little more comfortable.
I know where to go and how to get there without giving this too much thought. I have been living my life for a very long time now and to be clear, much of this is a trained series of habits, rituals and routines.
I drive over the same bridge each day when I go to work. I go in the same lane when going through the toll booths on the George Washington Bridge. I loop around and stay to the right. Then I make my way down the Westside Highway before turning left on 46th Street.
My job (or my day job as I like to call it) has become mainly automatic. I know where the time clock is. I know what to do when I see it.
I type in a series of numbers and then place my hand inside of a scanner to prove my time (and existence) to a computer which then calculates my hours and pays me at the end of the pay period.
My responsibilities are mainly the same. In fact, I see more of the same on a daily basis. Something breaks. Something needs to be fixed or a chore is in need of my attention. There are relationships that i have which are more of the same as well. I say hello to the same people. We say the same things to each other and like clockwork (and I mean this literally) we clock in and out at the same time, each day, and say “See you tomorrow” which is usually so.
I know where my tools are at work. I know who to speak with in case of a problem or an emergency. I know where all the places are to find lunch, which again, my body knows where to go without any real input from the mind.
I suppose this is why it is a true highlight to my day when a new place opens up. And additionally, this is why it is a huge letdown if the food isn’t good. But still, life in the average world is excited by small things, which inevitably lose their novelty and become part of a routine.
There are people who go through life and find themselves stuck in a mundane existence. This becomes their ordinary grind and almost unimaginative. There are people who can mindlessly navigate throughout their day without having to think an imaginative or original thought.
Each day is the same. Stuck. There are no exceptional highs or lows. Instead, life is routine. Life is a series of habits and trades with little reward. It is easy to slip into the brainless merger of mediocrity and averageness.
No one wants to be stuck or believe they are chained to a life or a desk, which if we think about, this can be depressing.
We see people like this. We see people who go to work each and every day. There is no real joy or passion. There is the basic commonality of saying hello to the same co-workers and pretending to laugh at the same jokes, which have lost their humor yet we still laugh because we go along to get along. We tolerate and endure this because this is us, for the time being.
Know what I mean?
There are people who have habitually trained themselves to live in the same patterns with the same people. To change or come to the idea that change is necessary is interesting to their surroundings. It’s always been like this before, right?
People can often find themselves in a trained position; whereas, we keep each other in a box and we compartmentalized one another in stages of use. Sometimes, this feels like a trap.
Sometimes, this can lead a person to believe they are stuck — or, they’ll say I “feel” like I’m stuck. Or I “feel” like I want more. Meanwhile, life goes on around them. People move in and out and follow the same patterns. And some say, “What? This is how it’s always been.”
People will often inspect their life and come to the idea that, “I want more.” Meanwhile, there are those around them who question, “You never wanted more than this before.”
Well, for the record, I want more too.
Just to explain, this is another stage of our training. This also keeps us stuck in the habitual patterns that lead to more of the same. People become used to a habitual pattern in our relationships.
For example, there is someone who is seen as a helper so people will go to them for help.
There is someone who is seen as a jokeste so people will go to them for a laugh.
There is someone who can fix things. There is someone who has learned to breathe out so the people around them can breathe in.
There are people who endure abuse or bullying and there are people who look for this so they can oblige and have their needs met as well.
We are placed in boxes and sorted into different levels of priority.
Don’t believe me?
Look at the food chain. Look at the ideas which we associate with bosses and managers. Think about the daily emails we send or the ones we ignore. Think about the text messages we answer and the ones we don’t.
Think about who we choose to call or choose to delay calling back because there are other things that take priority. And by the way, there are times when life happens and we are busy. This is normal. But prioritization shows how we fit into each other’s life.
A realization comes to open our eyes and allows us to realize that we want more. We deserve more. However, the training and the trained mindset is linked to a series of habitual patterns, which we need to change — otherwise, we find ourselves going back to old or default settings and more of the same.
No one wants to be stuck. No one wants to be leashed to a life or slaved to an existence that is nothing more (or less) than unrewarding.
This is why I always look to whet my appetite. This is why I give myself something to look forward to. I look for beautiful things and follow different ideas.
This is why I had to choose new directions and to detach from old settings because after years of habitual living, I came to the understanding that there was more for me in this world.
I am more than a career that I began 25 years ago. in order to be more, I chose to challenge the boundaries. I chose to change the way I address myself and others.
Or, in the simplest way put, I chose to switch my steps and keep from the commonness of a mundane life, in a mediocre world. I had to do this because I want more than an average life and an uninteresting return.
I remember the first time I tried to publish a piece of work. There were people in my life who laughed at me and said, “Who, you?”
I answered, “Yeah, me!” and then I watched people go back to their patterns as if to fill a role, which only they could choose for themselves.
I think the day I grew most was the day I decided to go for more instead of just asking for it. I had to make steps. After a while, I was no longer the person who fit in a box; but instead, I was able to change the parameters of where I fit and where I wanted to belong.
Everything can change with just one step.
But I admit it, I am afraid sometimes.
However, daring to tell you this is a step in the right direction. This puts me past the preparation stage and one foot closer to taking action.
I don’t want more of the same.
I just want more.
End of sentence.