I often find myself thinking about this hill I once knew. A long field of tall, wheat colored grass ran alongside the clearing where a tree, medium in height with a thick trunk, stood without any leaves on its oddly winding branches. There is not much around this place. There are no streets with homes or man-made structures of any kind. It is secluded here, which is why I imagine this place so often. And when I imagine this place, I imagine myself there alone with you.
I picture a Continue reading
Insomnia . . .
I lie in bed and try to find a comfortable spot on my right side. I straighten my legs. Then I curl them. I move the pillow to fit the contour of my neck and support my head. Then I pull my legs from the covers. Then I cover them back up because the blankets feel more comfortable that way.
Next, I roll to the left side and straighten my legs. Then I curl hem back. I adjust my pillow to fit the contour of my neck and support my head. I try to lay as still as I can with my eyes closed but the growing thoughts, which began as tiny seeds, have already grown roots and sprouted throughout my mind.
Once this happens, the thought process takes over. And once the thought process takes over, I cannot sleep until the energy from my thoughts is spent. This is like sitting in a car as it runs with a full tank of gas and waiting for the gas to run out without driving anywhere. I have to wait for the energy to fade. The problem here is this usually happens 20, maybe 30 minutes before my alarm clock says it’s time to wake up.
The tiny seeds, I just mentioned. The seeds that root and sprout become like weeds in my mind. They devour the minutes of rest and suffocate Continue reading
If I told you about all that went on, you would never believe the things that happened since I saw you last. So much has changed since the days when we lived at 277 Merrick Avenue. First and foremost, I no longer drag my feet when I walk. I open my mouth when I speak instead speaking through my teeth. I keep my hair short. I read a lot. I write a lot too. Most that knew me then never seem to recognize me now. And that is a good thing. It means they never really knew me.
The world is so much bigger now than it was then. A lot has gone on locally and globally. Locally, everything is different. With the exception of a few Continue reading
In Four Verses
A small paper package
falls empty to the ground
holding nothing but the remnants
of no return.
White powder disintegrates into blood
and the red Continue reading
Love As It Ages:
We are too far away now.
The distance between then and tomorrow
has so many miles between it.
I have memories of heavy rain
falling in an early spring night.
I think of the corner at Avenue A and St. Mark’s
and a place called Stingy Lu-Lu’s,
or Trash and Vaudeville
and the time we passed Continue reading
I remember when you would make me go upstairs and clean my room. It was early spring and we opened the windows for what seemed to be the first time all year. The house smelled like white linen. You made iced tea, remember? You always made the same brand, but you only made it in the warmer months.
Spring cleaning is what you called it. You made me check my drawers and see which clothes fit and which close we would give away. You had me go through my closet. Not sure if you knew this but my closet was my favorite hiding place. Instead of cleaning my room, I would pile my clothes in a bunch and Continue reading
I was around 19 years-old when I saw a violent death for the first time. It was wintertime and Old Country Road was busy with a heavy flow of late rush hour traffic that congested along the strip at the entrance near Fortunoff’s and Roosevelt Field Mall. The cold weather was tightening its grip.
Homes were undergoing the temporary renovation of Continue reading