So, where does it begin?
Through a window or an opportunity?
Is it a curiosity? Or what is it?
Is this a need to be bad or to rebel?
Is this to overthrow the powers that be
by being defiant or is it a need for control
and to take back the brand of excitement
by disobeying a rule or an establishment
How does this start?
Is there an age where this begins?
Is it nine or is it ten?
Or can this happen at any age
depending upon us or the whereabouts
of that which finally tripped us over the edge.
Or maybe this is all about our environment.
Maybe this is a case of nature versus nurture – or then again,
maybe this is normal.
“It’s just life”
Maybe this is something that comes with everyday living
which can be an unspoken benefit and yet,
this can also be a curse.
Life, I mean.
This can be the ingredient of madness or genius,
depending upon the angle and thus –
the instance depends upon the individual
or us, unique and ongoing
or infinitely different.
Where does it start?
Is this an instance of being the class clown
and thus seeing a benefit, which is mood altering –
Is that it?
Is this the cue, or the loop, or the reward?
Or does this solve the riddles of causation?
When I say causation, I mean
as in what caused you, me (or anyone)
to slip from the path of best behavior.
And by the way, what the hell do they mean by “Gateway?”
Is there really a gateway drug? Or, is it a drink?
How come no one ever says aspirin is a gateway?
They make us feel better too. Don’t they?
Isn’t that a drug?
I know what people think and I know what people say.
I also know that our society needs a scapegoat.
We need to find accountability
We want answers to unanswerable questions so yeah –
it makes sense to me
that we’re always trying to find out “Why”
or find something that “causes” the rotten pathways
that steal from our potential
So, let’s blame the drug.
Let’s blame the symptom
Do you want to talk about gateways?
Okay, I will go back to it then
Why don’t we talk about aspirin?
Is this not a drug? It is, isn’t it?
Or better yet, why not
take this back to the stages of infants with their pacifier
What happens when they cry?
Maybe they need comfort . . .
Maybe there’s another problem.
Maybe they’re tired or maybe they have a headache?
Maybe they’re scared of the monster in the closet
Or maybe they had a bad dream or idea.
Either way, they might have a condition or problem
but what they don’t have is the language to communicate.
So, what do they do? They cry.
And what do we do?
We pacify them with their pacifier
Does this solve the problem?
No, but this might help with a symptom . . .
which is fine enough,
especially if this stops the child from crying.
Right?
I have no opinions of right or wrong with this.
But, I will say that we have been taught since birth
to use an external source to solve an internal problem.
So, yes –
There are countless gateways out there.
But rather than focus on the gateway,
how come we never think about the source
or the reasons that makes us want to escape.
We all want it easier and softer.
Everyone wants the milk and honey yet
life is not simple
and there’s a call for changes which come at unexpected times.
There are pressures which can make the mind blow
All the mind wants is peace;
anything that can provide this peace is a gateway
and by the way, not all gates open to the dope nods
or the tragedies we see on the news.
I have entered through the gates of change
in more ways than one.
I have entered the dead-end gates and fortunately,
I have found other opportunities. We all have
which, of course; none of these came to us at the surface
or without peril.
No, we had to learn.
I know I did . . .
I had to fight to escape. I had to struggle or make mistakes
and though some of this was painful,
nothing can ever replace the face of hope
or the way I feel when I see this (or you)
and I know that no matter how I fall –
I can get up again and find my way
I don’t focus on symptoms anymore
I’d rather find the problem and create solutions
Otherwise, life can only be more of the same
The Written Addiction 