The following entry is written as more of a stream of conscious format. This is me in a sense, emotionally venting but also hoping that, yes, we can pull things together in a way that helps everything make sense.
Either way, the sun will go up and down and the moon will find its nightly pocket in the sky. Either way, the day will turn into night and the night will eventually turn into sunrise. Either way, this is life. Together we are no more different than we are the same.
We all have a story. We all have a background. We have a history, pathology or science, a pattern of living, routines, rituals and schedules that we use to keep our life in an understandable order. But ah, this is life. Not all things work out to our advantage. Not all changes come as expected nor do they come with explanations.
Not all things fit and not all things last.
Not everything is tragic nor is everything a success, not at all. Instead, it would be more accurate to say life comes with twists and turns and ups and downs. Yet, in the midst of our crazy little existence, we look for things, like tiny methods that fit into habitual patterns, which we use to allow us a moment of sanity.
I can say this is like music which is incorporated with our life. Or, this can be art; and as artists, this is our means of expression. This is our unspoken voice. This is our expression of love and of hope. This is our canvas and whether our art is the spoken word or woven like threads into the fabric of our lives, we are all a vision away from our fate. We are a moment of expression, a heartbeat, a breath and a source of energy that flashes like a star. We are in fact, incendiary, burning brightly in a moment of atmosphere – like us, or like this moment between here and now, and the heat which we create; this is our fuel source to help us navigate from here until tomorrow.
We are all free to move as we wish. Or we are all free to stand still or find a safe place. And please, I write this with the intention of looping us together, bonded by destiny.
We can all choose a moment like now to stop, just for a second, and reignite this flame that used to keep us alive.
For example, it is never too late to rekindle your spark or feed the flames of your heart. It is never too late to try something new or experience something spontaneous or connected.
It is never too late to hit the switch; as if to be in unison with the stars and aligned with fate; to be simpatico, together, like the great constellations in the sky which have been up there long before our time began. Quite likely, the stars will continue to shine even long after we are gone. Yet, there is something so attuned with us; there is something about this and the life we live. As if to say that it’s true; life is not an accident at all. (And neither is perfection.)
I think of the humbleness of a night beneath the stars. It’s a dream or more like a vision; this is somewhere away from the rest of the world and quietly detached while sitting by the firelight. I think of the mechanics of our life and the workings of how we find ourselves (or each other).
I think of the warmth between people and the coldness of others. Is it them (or they) and our experience therein which have inevitably led us all in a direction to find where we belong?
I think about the beautiful subtleties of romance or the various energies of fate which have both grown and evolved.
Then of course, I think about the childishness of youth and the simple forms of happiness that comes with something easy like a pack of chewing gum or a can of White Rock soda and a hot dog from the concession stand at the baseball fields on Merrick Avenue.
I think about the marvelous wonder that comes with youth when the circus comes to town – and for the moment, it’s safe to believe in the man on the flying trapeze. It’s safe to enjoy the clowns and find wonder in someone who eats fire or swallows an entire sword.
As I grow older and more distant from my beginnings, I am now aware more than ever about the simple synergy that comes with the purity of our youth. Somewhere, somehow, I find myself searching for a means to stay young and hopeful.
I want to reinvent myself and reconvene with the course of my younger dreams.
I want to find myself in the center of my world. I want to seek comfort to find comfort. I want to find something which brings out the cheer of say, eating a big bag of popcorn or seeing a movie in the theaters again.
I want to experience the wonderment of being present rather than misguiding myself (or us) by looking at the grass which is always greener in the yard next door.
I want to nurture each moment for everything its worth and leave nothing wasted or unwanted. I want to value this like a candlelight moment that I’ve dreamed about in a country-style home. I want to be way up high in a world where I’ve designed a place or a moment of refuge.
I want to value this like a memory of mine that comes from a drive I took through my old hometown. This was just at the time of sunset. There was a house with an old projector, screening a moving on a large white bed sheet that was pinned to a clothesline.
(What an incredible idea this was!)
And there they were a family, a mix of friends and loved ones, sitting in front of the sheet, lined up in a few chairs and munching from overflowing bowls of buttered popcorn and watching a movie in a way that seemed perfect to me.
I am on a search. This is true. Then again, this is why I say that we are no more different than we are the same. We are all on a journey of some kind. We are all blessed in some occasions and star-crossed in others. We are formations, like the stars, and the memories we build are the constellations of our legacies which we leave behind.
If you ask me, we spend way too much time arguing about meaningless things. We waste time and energy. We waste irretrievable minutes that can add up to hours or maybe even days which then become weeks, months and perhaps even years. Then what?
There we are, wondering why we never made the time to set up that movie projector and recreate a moment with family, friends and loved ones alike.
By the way, there are countless ways to make popcorn.
How great would that be at sundown, just moments before the last light when the sun goes down, the fireflies begin their travels and then shhh . . .
the movie is about to begin.
No matter what age we become, there will always be a need to either create or recreate a moment of purity, just because, just for us, just to know that no matter where we go; there will always be a light from us like the stars above – to live on forever.
Simply beautifully written, and a piece each and every one of us can relate to!!♥️