I have to say this . . .
I stand firm with this next idea. And I believe this with all of my heart and truly, I agree that we are all the same in this sense. And yes, I know that common sense is not always so common and neither is common decency; however, I fully agree with the saying, “never in the history of calming down has anyone ever calmed down simply by being told to calm down.”
I do think that being told to calm down has an opposite or an adverse effect on many of us.
Not just me . . .
That being said, I agree.
I need to calm down.
I need to find my center or find my peace.
I need to “let go!” Obviously I need to do this as it has been suggested to me a thousand times over.
I agree.
I agree that when my thoughts turn against me, it would be a great idea to think differently, which is why I replace thoughts with an opposite or a beneficial action.
“Just don’t think like that” is a special kind of genius that makes no sense to me.
Replace thought with action . . .
And no, this does not always make me feel better. But replacing thoughts with an opposite and beneficial action has never made me feel worse.
I am man . . .
Hear me roar.
I am man
Hear me complain too.
No one likes a complainer.
No one likes an angry man.
No one loves the man who sits on the outside and always seems to be the one on the outside looking in.
Or so I think
Or so I believe.
No one settles the loneliness at night when thoughts multiply and the insomnia comes for tea and disturbs me until an hour before my alarm goes off.
This seems like the time I always fall back to sleep.
There was a man in my past who used to drink himself senseless and in his best assumption, he believed that his life would be better served if he left his home and his so-called loved ones and refurbished old barns and painted their sides to make them complete.
He said he imagined himself painting the side of barns and being “okay” with life.
He sobered up.
He eventually lost his mind to an after-effect from a life that was lived with poor care.
He lost his mind.
But, like, he lost his mind for real this time.
I have lost money.
I have lost my love life
I have lost family
I have lost my mind in a million different ways
I have lost time
I have lost distance and the space between us
I have lost everything more than once.
I just do not want to lose you
or my mind
or more of my time, which is escaping me
God, I love you
I wish that I was more comfortable with my reflection.
I wish that the narrative in my head was less critical and my internal enemies learned how to get along and be my best friend
“We are our own worst critic,” is what I was told
Let the critic die, I say
Save your own life
Be your own best friend
And when the door opens to live, love, laugh and learn, go through it like this was the best day of your life
Trust me on this one
I think you’ll be glad you did
