It is Monday Evening.
The sky is orange just west and north of New York City and I am outbound on a bus, sitting in the usual window seat as I head home with a world of too much thought, and a heart with too many emotions. It won’t be long now. Soon enough, the leaves will change color and the autumn months will take the stage. I swear there are no sunsets like autumn sunsets. Tonight was only Continue reading
The When and Where
I come from such an interesting time. Like others, my family moved from a busy neighborhood to something quiet. We went from the active street behind Queens Boulevard to a less active, certainly quiet town away from the boroughs and into the suburban life. I have pictures of my old home somewhere. When we first moved in, the siding was brown on our two story cape. Our street was one of the main ones in the neighborhood. Across from us was a large empty field, several acres in size, bordered and separated by mound of dirt, which traced the outline of the vacant lot. Only, this was no ordinary field or vacant lot. This was once Continue reading
There Are No Friends Like Old Friends
There are no friends like old friends. Above anything I know as fact; I know this is certainly true. There are no friends like old friends. There is no one else in the world like the kids from the neighborhood. I know this. I know this as well as I know my own blood that moves through my body. No matter where we go in life, how far we move away, what we turned into, or how successful we become—old friends will always be old friends. They will always have a piece of our heart. They will always matter and when we are older; when we look back at ourselves and the life we lived; when we need a laugh or whenever we feel the need for a fresh breath of nostalgia, our old friends and the things we did together will always find Continue reading
For you
As strange as it sounds, there is freedom in our failures. When there’s nothing left to lose and everything crashes; there is nothing left to worry about. Since all is lost, the pressure is lifted. There is nothing left to protect. There are no reasons to hide anymore. We are out now. We are already exposed and the bottom we hit is cold, hard, and absolutely painful.
When you hit bottom—at least this is bottom and you have nowhere left to fall.
Whether things could Continue reading
Poetry From The Lunchroom
Lunchtime Prose:
This is you. . .
The walls are closing in
and your world is like a small room
that you can’t get out of.
You’re confined in your own mind.
You feel Continue reading
Dear Mom
I was thinking about the way our need for attention volleys back and forth. Back when I was a small boy, I used to complain about my bedtime. I would scream and cry about it too.
As kids, we try so hard to grow up fast. I never wanted to sit still. I never wanted to miss anything. I wanted to be a Continue reading
For those with pets
This piece is for animal lovers. If you are not or never have been an animal lover, this piece will either sway you towards the idea or help you understand the love people feel towards their family pets.
I warn you, this may get a little sappy. There will be no apologies, and those who understand will see themselves as people that understand for a reason. Not everyone grew up or appreciates the same benefits in life. However, those who grew up with a family cat or dog will understand with warmth in their heart and perhaps a tear in their eye.
As a special note, and before I move forward, I think it will be helpful for you to imagine the house you grew Continue reading
From The Blue Collar Kid
In afternoon, the hot white sand is a bed to the body of undressed footsteps. The soft waves move in from a turquoise bay and fold upon the length of an empty shoreline, which to me, runs on for miles.
The sun has already peaked and the glowing mass returns from its summit and begins to submit to the horizon. The beach is empty in this dream. Perhaps it is this way for a reason. The sky is clearly blue and without a cloud to interrupt the view of an unobscured heaven. I am south of the equator, or so I suppose, and with all my heart, I do not want to leave this place.
I don’t want to move from Continue reading
A Back To School Comparison
It is the end of August and the summer moves closer to its unofficial end. The hours of daylight have already begun to shorten and students are preparing for the upcoming school year. I find myself wondering if anything has changed. I know the classrooms are different. The teachers from my time have all retired. Some of them have passed away. I know the computers are different and the styles from my day have changed throughout the years. I wonder, however, if the core emotions are still the same as when I was a teenage boy. I wonder if the feelings are any different and what the crowds are like.
I wonder what the social strategies are with today’s youth. What are the social draws? What are the crowds like Continue reading
Panic Attacks: An Explanation
I saw something the other day and it stuck with me. It was a picture with the words, “Never in the history of calming down has anyone ever calmed down by being told to calm down.”
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.
Like many other people, I suffer from occasional to sometimes frequent anxiety attacks. They come on suddenly and often blindingly. However, after a careful consideration of these attacks; I realize they usually begin with a trigger. I see it like a unexpected storm that hits the horizon. The sky turns dark and loses daylight. One droplet falls. Then two droplets, three, and in seconds, the sky opens up and pours down in an angry rain.
When the storm hits, I lose visibility. I can’t think straight or focus because the rain is too heavy. This is how my panic attacks feel. When the anxiety hits, I began to lose choices. I lose my ability to negotiate or navigate my way through simple tasks. Everything happens at the wrong pace. Everyone seems to be in my way.
All I want to do is get out—and by out, I mean out of wherever I am. I’d like to get out of my skin. I would like to get out of my body—but I can’t so I begin to feel closed in. I feel claustrophobic and the Continue reading
