Over the years, I have tried to replace the things I have stolen or broken. In an effort to change, I made direct amends to those I have harmed, “Except when to do so would injure them or others.”
A friend asked me, “Do you think there will ever be a time when you don’t feel you have to pay back?”
And my answer was, “No.”
Yesterday marked the close of Yom Kippur. And though my faith has branched in Continue reading
Man on 44th Street says he has seen God.
I have never seen God myself, but I have seen some of His angels on occasion.
I think the sun may have tricked my eyes when this happened and I might have mistaken their wings for something else.
But I know I’ve seen them.
I have this reoccurring dream, though it’s been Continue reading
I like to look back and view my beginning to illustrate my growth.
I went from a full house to an empty two bedroom apartment in the upstairs of a private home. This was my square one.
I went from vacant walls and an empty fridge to a slow rebuild, which began with a small dining room table.
The round table was made of Continue reading
A)
You asked me, “What happened?”
It would be dishonest to say there were no signs of my upcoming downfall. My relapse came in stages, and above all lessons; I know this one to be true.
Every step I take either puts me one step closer to becoming healthy—or it takes me one step further away.
I knew something was coming towards me. I knew because listening to my old thoughts was as comfortable as putting on an old familiar shirt. There was no surprise in my collapse and my Continue reading
I landed my first job when I began the seventh grade. It wasn’t much as far as pay goes. I delivered 98 newspapers to homeowners on a daily basis.
I began after school and I took my collections on Thursday evenings. I made my rounds at the start of twilight, and if I Continue reading
(Stream of consciousness thought)
The sun came up over New York City and I was lost somewhere between the hours of missed sleep and a mild swarm of confusion. I am at an impasse and I am not sure which move comes next.
Taking my coffee time to the roof above Lexington Avenue, I felt the autumn breeze flow against me.
I faced the downtown buildings with a view of the East River to my left and the Brooklyn bound bridges in the distance.
I believe the sunrise was meant for moments like this. I watch the sunrise and see it as an opportunity to gain a moment of clarity. I think this is the best time to shed the wasted thoughts and prepare for a new day. And this morning; I chose to do just that. Continue reading
As a boy, I would go to Temple with my family on this day.
Today marks the day of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. On this day, my father closed his shop and he would put on his suit. He wore an unmistakable brand of cologne with an aroma that can never be forgotten. My mother would wear a dress, and she smelled from her perfume of choice.
My brother and I wore Continue reading
1)
A man’s love for woman
is the same as his need for food and survival.
And truly, it is incredible what man will do to survive.
It is amazing how limitless he can be when hungry
. . . . . and she becomes his only meal.
2)
My yesterday left as soon as I walked away.
Everything was gone,
except for the strands of hair you left on my pillow Continue reading
Before I continue, I think it would help if you could imagine the sounds at a little league baseball game. Imagine a baseball field with aluminum bleachers behind either of the fenced-in dugouts.
The bleachers are not overwhelmingly tall, or overly crowded, but this is where the parents sit and cheer for their kids.
Picture, if you can, other parents and family scattered at the fences of either sideline. They sit in lawn chairs from their home with perhaps, a sweater or sweatshirt draped over the back of the chair, and all of them gather or group in their usual cliques.
Envision an average suburban town with a main road bordering the ballpark. A white billboard sign welcomes at the front entrance. Upon it is the town’s Continue reading
Many years ago, I sat in my Aunt Sondra’s house and she introduced me to a big pillow.
She called this pillow, “The Angry pillow,” and said, “You can do whatever you want to that pillow. You can pick it up and slam it down. You can kick it, punch it, choke it and shake it. You can yell at it too. And yelling is good! You can do anything you want to The Angry Pillow because that’s what it’s there for.”
But I was hesitant.
The pillow was multicolored and stood nearly Continue reading
