If you do not know your own worth
…….then you do not know what you are giving away.
And if you do not know what you are giving away
…….then you cannot be sure if the people you offer yourself to
are deserving of what you give them.

Understand?

You need to see yourself as more than just a vehicle.
You need to know you are more than body
…….you are a beacon
You are the light, and light in its truest form is purity.

Know this:
Know that your words have value
Know that your time is worthy,
and so is the care you so freely give away.

Remember Matthew 7:6
“Do not give what is sacred onto dogs, and do not cast your pearls before swine,
for they will trample them under their feet
and tear you to pieces with them.”

Do not spoil your donations because they are sacred
and once they are gone
they are as irretrievable as sand falling through the bottom of an hourglass
…….and you will be nothing more than under-appreciated

Or worse

…….disregarded

In the backseat of a rental car near the outskirts El Paso Texas, I waited at a railroad crossing and watched a freight train move slowly along the tracks. I was young enough to still be curious, but old enough lose interest in the line of ongoing freight cars.
I remember the air was Continue reading →

Something is coming my way.
I don’t know what it is, but I know a change is coming.
I can feel it.

After working the overnight, I pulled another 8-hour shift, and I picked up exactly where I left off.
Lately, I’ve been re-piping a lot of old cast-iron radiators.
I’ve been moving them from one spot to another, which means Continue reading →

The best time to take a drive is early in the morning. I was heading west on Hempstead Turnpike. The sun arrived behind me in the east and splashed its reflection across the glass buildings on Glenn Curtis Blvd.
The roads were empty with the exception of a few cars, driving in different lanes, and filtering through the traffic lights.
My only company was the radio, and as I enjoyed the Continue reading →

Quietly alone in my section of the world, I looked out my window, and into the morning sky.  I took my Continue reading →

After my time on the farm, everything I had, and everything I learned was compiled and stuffed into a duffle bag. My clothes were different. My hair was different too. I had gained weight and my voice sounded more like Continue reading →

Look at me now…
I live in a home with a few dogs. I have a family. I have rugs on the floor. I have a kitchen and a fridge with food. The heat works in the wintertime, and in the summer, my air conditioners keep the house cool.
There are pictures on the wall, a few paintings, and some mirrors.
I have a shelf with Continue reading →

1)

It is morning in our millennium
The sun has yet to rise and burn through the fog.
I suppose I could be sleeping …..but of course….. I’m not.

Instead, I am on a train
I am looking through the window and watching the glowing streetlamps,
which look like blurry halos in the misty haze,
and they fade in the distance as my train pulls me farther from my home.

The sky is more charcoal now than dark.
My eyes are tired.
I could close them, but…

I never sleep on the train.

My back is towards my direction
my face is away from my destination
and my heart is somewhere else
…probably lying on her side, sleeping, and hopefully dreaming of me.

2)

They say you can hear the ocean if you put a seashell to your ear.
I say that’s good.
This way, you can put a seashell next to your ear and hear where my heart lives.

If you listen, you will hear the surf and imagine the seagulls.
You will picture the white foam that reaches the sand,
and the folding waves that return to the tides.

If you listen to this sound, repeatedly….
You will imagine the wintertime sand, still embedded with the footprints and the memories of summer’s warmth.
You will imagine me standing at the edge of the ocean, looking at the clouds above the water, as if they were the beard of God the Father, and the shoreline around me will be vacant.

I have no place more precious than this
but if you happen to find a seashell
put it up to your ear and I promise I will share it with you.

3)

The sun has gone down over the city
The buildings have brightened their smiles with lights to accentuate the skyline.
It’s late on the Island of Manhattan
I could be sleeping …..but of course….. I’m not

My back is towards the Uptown
My face towards the Brooklyn Bridge, and same as when I left this morning,
my heart is probably lying on her side, sleeping, and hopefully dreaming of me.

It is hard to see the fairness of age. The body changes and the bones ache.
Our vision becomes less than what it was. Our memory fades, or otherwise, blend into inaccurate versions of misremembered facts….

I remember The Old Man never seemed frightened of anything. He wasn’t bothered by the dark. He never minded the cold, or backed away from a challenge, or hard work.
No, the only thing that frightened The Old Man was being old. He was afraid of becoming incapable, or sick.

My mother never Continue reading →

Once we establish heat between us,
there is no place warmer than this:

I imagine you, so often…..
your eyes close as my lips press against yours
Your skin is soft                      Your voice is gentle

I envision you lying on your side
while curling naked beneath the sheets.
Your eyes twinkle in the candlelight and your smile
represents the remnant of wine at the bottom of your glass.

The way you lay shows anticipation,
and the way you watch me shows your desire
I like that….

I love these versions of you, which I keep with me
I collect them like photographs and use them in my dreams.
I use them as I imagine how it feel to cruise along your body

…..and explore every inch, every piece, every curve

Forgive me if my jaw clinches.
This only means I want you.
And if I growl, it means I feel like a carnivore,
or a hunter–and you are my beautiful game.

But do not mistake my dominance
I can be as gentle as I am wild
I could switch from hard and aggressive
to soft and gentle

Once we have established the connection between us –
the possibilities are endless

or

Infinite…..