If asked if I believe then I would say yes, I do believe in something. I believe there is something out there. Maybe it’s just energy. Maybe what I believe in is a balance to the unbalanced life we live. Maybe it’s just a need to have something on my side, or maybe this is me talking to myself, which is something that I do often. But again, if asked do I believe in prayers then my answer is yes, I do believe in the power of prayer. This is not so much about my belief in God or the lack thereof. It is not even about religion, let alone an organized religion, or about a man or woman who stands on an altar or at a podium and tells me what to say or how and when.
Continue readingA New Entry from “A Little From The Abstract”
There are times when we can feel something coming. We don’t know what it is or what it will be but either way, we can feel something coming. Maybe it’s a change. Maybe it’s a change for the better. Or maybe it’s an end to a chapter that needs to close, yet, we’re still in the middle and we’re not ready to finalize anything. Maybe it’s just a mood. Or maybe it is a predicament of the mind. Maybe this is why we think or feel this way. Maybe it’s the stress levels of the surrounding atmosphere that begins to over-pressurize this capsule, which we call our life.
I want to breathe, we say. And we want the weight to go away. Or in exchange, I can spell the word differently to take on an entirely different meaning and say “we want the wait to go away.” But either way, the word pertains to a sense of heaviness. In which case, either meaning can still mean the same thing.
California Dreams: Imperial Beach, S.D.
There were mornings there in which I swore were nothing like any mornings I had ever seen before. The sea and the sunrise look different on the West coast as opposed to the East. The grayness of morning and the silvery mist atop the blue Pacific and the rumble sounds of the waves crashing in and then hissing after the collapse to return to sea was how I’d see the mornings. This, by the way, is how the Earth breathes. The ocean swells and the waves rise and fall like the chest of the body as it inhales and breathes out.
Continue readingThe Anti-Bully: Be Your Own Hero
It’s not only what people say. It’s the way these things linger in the mind. It’s not the instance of bullying, it’s the aftermath. It’s the buildup of insult after insult and injury after injury. To believe this has no long-term effects is simply inaccurate. To believe that any trauma has no long lasting reactions is equally inaccurate.
Continue readingNotes from The Coach: On a Personal Level About Forgiveness
Sometimes the lines we cross can never be uncrossed. Keep in mind, words cannot be unsaid and oftentimes, words hurt. They can scar. Words can destroy to a level that no apology can ever repair. Yet, in the fit of anger or in the heat of the moment, we can say things that we wish we never said.
Continue readingMy Christmas List
Moving through the month of December, we are at the home stretch of the holiday season. People are looking for their last minute stocking-stuffers and gifts to put under the tree. I have some ideas myself. I have some thoughts about what I’d like to get this year. I have some ideas of gifts I’d like to give. Unfortunately, my ideas go a little beyond the normal catalog abilities and nothing from my list is sold in stores.
Continue readingFinding the Right Connection
There is a reason why finding our match is difficult. Synergy and cohesion between people is not a simple occurrence. There is a reason for this. There are people and personalities which we find magnetic and others that seem to repel or push us away. There is chemistry to us all and details which are up front in some cases and less obvious in others.
Situations can seem too good to be true. This happens. There are people we fit in with effortlessly. Meanwhile, there are others that lack the connection. Instead of finding a cohesive bond; never the twain shall meet. And this is really just a fancy way of saying neither of the two people will ever see eye-to-eye. And that’s fine. No, really it is.
The Panic Button
You want to know where it comes from. You want to know why. You want to calm down. You want to feel fine. More than anything, the last thing you want to feel is trapped in your skin. And that’s what happens when the thought machine trips. But how does this start?
The mind has a way of creating the stir. It comes on like a trickle, like one drop of rain falling from the sky to warn of an upcoming storm and all you want to do is run for cover. You try to find yourself someplace safe but the roof leaks and the storm hits. The downpour is ugly and the panic you feel is like trying to plug a leak that keeps coming up someplace else.
No one ever welcomes these bouts of anxiety yet, ready or not, here it comes.
From The Boys: A Taste of City Nostalgia
What I miss the most about those days are the crazy little places and the wild little dives that we went to or that we ate in. The City was a much different place to me. I was young and learning more about the romance I have between myself and the different streets and different places. There were different feelings which pertained to the different parts of the Downtown venues or Uptown, plus there were the Eastside or the Westside places, which all came with different vibes. There was a separation between daylight and nighttime and the places to go or the things to do, say like, get a haircut at Astro place, and get ready for the sun to go down so that we could howl and be crazy.
Continue readingA Note: Just for the Record
This is how I see it. And I don’t say that I speak for everyone. Then again, I never wanted to speak for everyone. I only want to speak for myself. And here it comes, the holiday season is already here. Meanwhile, the rest of the world moves on to do its thing. Family and friends are living their life. Kids are growing and life is changing. The places we went to as kids are different now but then again, the entire world is different now. And meanwhile, all you see is the same rooms and the same people. The only people you talk to are the people in the groups or the counselors or the people that work at the facility you’re in.
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The Written Addiction 